Don't Make Me Read Your Mind

When my sister and I were young, we had a bad habit that drove my mother absolutely insane. If we were looking for something and went to ask her for help, we had the propensity to say, "Mom, can you help me find the 'thingie' for the 'doodad' that does the 'stuff.' Or something of that nature in any case. It was a real sticky point with her when we did that. Of course, we knew exactly what we were talking about, but Mom would say, "I'm not a mind reader. You're going to have to tell me what you're looking for." To which we would so sagely reply, "I told you I'm looking for the 'thingie'. . . " It was like a bad version of "Who's On First."

Well, my sister and I both have children now, and we feel Mom's pain. Our kids, despite being extremely intelligent and capable of complex conversation, insist on asking us to find 'thingies' and 'stuff.' I've heard my mom's words tumble back out of my mouth as I stood there having the oddest sense of deja vu.

Now, after a particularly long session of the "I'm Not A Mind Reader Game" with my daughter, I started thinking about how I still fall into this trap as an adult. Oh, I've grown past the 'thingie' requests of my childhood, but I still expect people to read my mind sometimes. I think maybe we all do it to some extent.

How often in a day do you think, "I really love my husband" but not tell him. Aren't there times when you spend time with a friend and are reminded how much their friendship means to you, but you don't stop to tell them? We tend to pass over the positive things while we are quick to point out negatives. We do it to our spouses, our children, our friends.

I've been struggling off and on lately. I'm sort of trapped alone at home a lot. My husband is working two jobs, and we are a one car family, which gives me way too much time to think. I tend to pick myself apart, and the enemy really loves to sow seeds of doubt in those times. I doubt my abilities as a wife and mother. I beat myself up about my lack of perfection as a musician. I question whether I'll ever be a good photographer. I have a million of them, and the devil loves a good opening. He jumps right in and starts offering suggestions of my other shortcomings.

Do you know what stops those rambling doubts? Encouragement. Words of comfort. Being reminded by a friend of who I am in Christ. I'm not sure when we are all going to figure out that we need each other, and none of us are mind readers. We need to speak encouragement and comfort into the lives of those around us not just think it. Just hearing that you are valued and appreciated makes a world of difference.

Please don't misunderstand me. I have to realign my focus on who I am in Christ and not pin my value to my talents or skills or lack thereof. I have to cast off the doubts that the enemy would place in my life if I allow it. However, sometimes it takes the words of a friend and fellow Jesus-lover to help in that quest.

I found this word in 2 Corinthians 1:3-5 this morning. It says:

³Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, ⁴who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. ⁵For as we share abundantly in Christ's sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too.

So, next time you think something good about someone, don't just think it, share it. It's so easy to pick up the phone, walk across the street, send an e-mail, or write on someone's wall (on Facebook, of course). Through that simple act of sharing a word of comfort or encouragement you are not only showing your love and concern, you are sharing the love of our Savior. And there is no greater gift than that.

Blessings!